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New One

extra for the editors of this monthly magazine: we will always write our reports and other features before the end of the month. Unfortunately, we haven’t quite made up which of these are real resolutions or pure plans. The course of the decade will decide.
Otherwise, all is as swell as it could be. The sun is shining – at least where we were when writing this. And there is not a single cloud in the sky. Which leaves us to the sole wish that your year 2014 will be as bright and sparkling as this day is today. May you stick to your plans and some of your resolutions. (MF)

newbroom-e-gram

marihuana. It will see the jolliest (albeit haziest) Christmas ever.
December 16 & 17 – In Austria and Germany, Great Coalitions take up work. Actually, the “great” is only in their size in numbers, not (probably) in any of their ideas.
December 23 – Russia’s president Putin actually lets some critics of his politics out of prison. This is definitely not a sign of his magnanimity but propaganda to support the upcoming Olympic Winter Games in Russia.
December 25 – MERRY CHRISTMAS! We sure had a merry one, the turkey a less merry one.
December 30 - A volcano in San Salvador erupted. However, the ashes did not manage to stop international airfare. So, the Icelandic volcano still takes the crown for pulling that stunt.
December 31 – New Year’s Eve, and that all day long… Hilarious, isn’t it?

The Magical Bachelor - Brian Wants a Wife!

developments avidly, looking for scandalous details. But since waiting is so dreary, let us just have a quick peek at the list of ladies Violet compiled:
a. Rita Skeeter – competition in the journalistic stakes
b. Muriel Weasley – a bit elderly, but rather experienced
c. Penelope Clearwater – bright and sweet if a little young
d. Dolores Umbridge – the readers love the old bat, Merlin knows why…
e. Pomona Sprout – she’s got authority, might do Brian some good
f. Evangeline Evergreen – Witch Weekly’s Shiniest Hair Contest Winner
g. Katrina O’Shea – author of “Poison Ivy”, wants to sell her novel
You see, dear readers, this will be an exciting year and we can definitely promise that there will be love in the air! (VV)

“Be Prepared”

(Our Headquarters) Sticking to our new New Year's Resolution to always do our things in time, we decided to take care of our Christmas preparations for this year already. As we are not the best at decorative and baking tasks, we decided to invite an expert, Ginger Bread, to talk about the upcoming Christmas season and decoration you can eat – or rather, we can eat.
MF: Thank you for taking the time to talk to us today.
GB: You're welcome.
MF: Now, we have all set our minds on having some nice Christmas decoration which can be eaten after or in the worst case before Christmas.
GB: The best material for this sort of decoration is dough, gingerbread, would qualify. You can store it for a long time. And as a matter of fact, it tastes best after you have stored it for some time.
MF: And what can we do with this special dough?
GB: Well, you can cut out tree decoration and ornaments. Make sure to punch in a hole so that you can put a piece of thread through it. The advantage is that you can go for any shape. You can go for the classical shapes or choose very modern versions.
MF: That's nice. But you can't eat them immediately?
GB: No, you have to wait at least 3 weeks. The gingerbread has to ripen and this is done best if you leave it alone.

MF: So what do we have to do?
GB: You don't have to do anything. You have the shape you desire, you might even decorate the ornaments with icing or nonpareil balls or almonds or whatever you like and you put it out of sight and once your tree is ready you put them on the tree. You should just make sure that they are exposed to moisture, because moisture is the secret ingredient that will make the gingerbread soft.
MF: Where do we get this moisture from?
GB: Well, if you put them into a metal box you should add half an apple that should do the trick. Once you hung them on the tree there is no need for extra moisturising.
MF: That's quite good, then. What else can we do with this dough.
GB: Naturally, a gingerbread house would add to any Christmas table.
MF: Wow, but it's not life-size?
GB: Actually, if you have enough ingredients you can build it life-size. Still, I would recommend to build a smaller one.
MF: How would we proceed.
GB: Now, first you need the dough and you should try out the dough first. There are a lot of different recipes, find the one that is to your taste. It took me three or four different doughs to find the one that works for me. You prepare the dough as said in the recipe and then you have to cut out the pieces for your house. There are some special cutters but you can also make use of clean cardboard. If you want to have

nice windows you can put some candies into the holes for the windows. The candy will melt and form a sort of translucent material.
MF: That sounds like a lot of work.
GB: Admittedly it is, but if you save at this point you risk that your house will look crap or just fall apart.
MF: We see.
GB: Once they are baked and cool you put the different parts of the house together. You can use boiled sugar but careful it is very very hot. The advantage is that it will glue the different parts together pretty quickly. Once all of this is done, you can start decorating. And there you can do anything you like.
MF: That sounds great.
GB: It is great! And a lot of fun, too.
MF: Now this is the critical question: when do we start with this.
GB: As a matter of fact you can start right away with the dough as you can store it for a year at least.
MF: Unbaked?
GB: Unbaked, probably a little less once it is baked, but usually, they don't last that long because they are simply eaten after a while.
MF: Thanks a million, I guess we're just trying to find the perfect recipe now.
GB: I'm glad I could be of help.
At this point Mike rushed off to find all sorts of different recipes for gingerbread. We guess, that right now he is still trying out the tastes of different gingerbreads. Yes, very distinctly we have the feeling that we can hear him munching at this very moment. (MF)

Another British King Uncovered

(Great Britain) Late rumours have it that another former British King was uncovered – presumably on another car park. One remain, a pelvis bone to be precise, was dug up and probably belongs to Alfred the Great who reigned over Wessex between 871 and 899.
As this has proven such a great success story for Richard III and now for Alfred the Great as well, future kings are considering the possibilities of being buried on or rather under a car park. A well known fact is that most of the English royals are safely buried away in Westminster Abbey – well dead ones that is - and are not attracting the attention they deserve nowadays, Richard seems to have struck the jackpot as did the pelvis of Alfred.
The modern day alternatives are either Frogmore to join Vic or St George's Chapel to join loads of Germans and Henry VIII. Apparently, both Richard and Alfred went for the better

alternative by finding themselves a unique place to be buried. And to be found again.
Quite obviously the car park in Leicester is out of the question now and some of Alfred's remains were found around Winchester and some of the car parks there have not been dug over yet, but still Winchester is erased from the list as well. Unfortunately, it's not that simple to find out about car parks. The Internet does not really offer the kind of information you are looking for when looking for the place to rest in peace for ever.
You might ask how Richard and Alfred found there respective places for their eternal rest, well, believe it or not, but back when they died, there was no Internet, no smart-phone and no map of the world online. What did they do to find the perfect place? They travelled around the countryside and once spotting the perfect car park, dropping dead on the spot – after they had made sure that someone was around to bury them. (MF)

Horrorscope 2014

Cancer (23.06.-23.07.) – If you take on any more tasks, you will undoubtedly break down. On the other hand, do as you wish, the crystal ball predicts a breakdown anyway.
Leo (24.07.-23.08.) – You’re a lucky one! Whatever you touch will work out fine. Enjoy your success while it lasts.
Virgo (24.08.-23.09.) – New challenges will replace your irksome troubles. Sometimes it is better to cut something off entirely before embarking towards new horizons.
Libra (24.08.-23.10.) – Although you will be given much more responsibility, you will thrive with it instead of feeling overtaxed. You will simply enjoy the hassle, so go for it!
Scorpio (24.10.-22.11.) – You can try to avoid awkward situations, but try as you might, you always stumble into them. With good grace, you can still manage to look less foolish than you feel.
Sagittarius (23.11.-21.12.) – So you want to change your life? Then get active for once and grab at the straws you are handed. You are in danger of losing your last friends.

Sudoku

	7
								7
				7
7
							7
			7
					7
						7
		7

This one promises to be tricky, Severus!

Disclaimer: All names, characters and places are property of J.K. Rowling and Warner bros., except of those not found in the "Harry Potter" books and movies which belong to Ulrike Friedrich and Kirsten Seelbach. No financial and/or commercial gain is intended.