(St. Andrews) Superb scientists spent a long time trying to finally find out the mean mystery of mankind: What makes a man, well, a man?
Since evil experiments using humans are fiercely forbidden, the biologists brought bristly worms into their lovely laboratories. Bristly worms are not necessarily very much like humans, but

they do have different sexes, unlike snails.
However, bristly worms can actually change their sex. This is the sensation: If you take a female bristly worm and take away its brain, it becomes male!
Thus, the secret of maleness is, basically, brainlessness.
(MF)

Plenty of people are persistently planning the perfect period of 24 hours. However, what are the important ingredients that initially improve our everyday day? Naturally, newbroom dived deeply into the tremendous topic to dutifully discover exceptional evidence for satisfying strategies clearly concerning positive day development. For a serious start we searched for the willing waking up. This is contemporarily caused not by the shrill thrill your alarm clock always causes but by the soft singing

of beautiful birds. By the way, this is also the natural way of waking after a well-deserved afternoon nap – as we have already observed in our office. The subsequent step simply escaped us as we are by now so accustomed to the noi-sound of our feathered friends that we obviously overslept and therefore merely missed the other methods of making the day. Good night, sleep tight and shut up, you early birds, save the worms.

(broompire) In the exciting fourth show of broompire’s sensational highlight, Ministers Got Talent, we will see what really distinguishes the fully-fledged political professional from the fledgling failures. Harriet Kettle-Stove and Leslie Pagana-Greenacre are just as much on edge as the candidates about the fourth task!
“Harriet, here we go again, and this time the task for our remaining contestants is especially difficult, isn’t it?”
“Oh yes, and definitely very basic to the intricate maze of politics. Our candidates, our hopefuls, will have to stand that very much detested ordeal, that prime task of each and every politician – they will have to give an interview.”
“And who better to interview them but the queen of gossip, the celebrated celebrity reporter, our very own Violet Vainglory?”
“Yes, Leslie, that’s true, Violet Vainglory conducted the interviews. Unfortunately she cannot be here tonight, so we can show you the interviews only on screen, but you will be thrilled by her superb technique.”
“Of course, Harriet, we also have a wonderful guest juror, the Hungarian Prime Minister, Mr Orbán. He is very skilled with the press, or I’ve been told.”
“That’s true. He will be an excellent juror. Oh, here it begins. The first to face her fierce questions is Sybil Trelawney. Oh dear, she’s not even able to predict the weather for tonight – well, it is hard when there is no window to check the sky.”
“But isn’t it amazing how well Sybil performed, anyway, Harriet? I thought she might crack on the question whether she feels guilty about having brought about the death of the Potters.”
“Let us see the next interview. This is Draco Malfoy. Hm, not much fazes that young man to be sure. Leslie, I fear we won’t get rid of him soon. His father was seen to try and bribe our guest juror, by the way.”

(broompire) Another great name out of the world of world politics agreed to become one of our show’s guest jurors and even more to it, he even agreed to grant us the honour of an interview. Let us introduce you to the one and only Hungarian Prime Minister Victor Orbán.
VV: Well as a matter of fact we usually don’t tend to be so biased in favour of one of our interviewees. Besides, even if we are very much in favour of any of them, we have never before allowed them to compose their own introductory paragraph.
VO: Well, if you don’t like it or – what would be more important – don’t print it you can forget all about the interview. What is this little curious thing here that seems to be so busy?
VV: What…oh that, it’s just a hysterical wand.
VO: Looks like a biro to me. Is it making any notes?
VV: No, how could it, it’s a wand. The biro is as we understand it an invention from Hungary, isn’t it?
VO: Yes, it was one of my fellow countrymen who invented this most

(Germany) Chancellor Angela Merkel is not known for being somebody who suffers idiotic behaviour for too long. Her definition of idiotic behaviour, though, might not necessarily be that of everyone.
When you look at Madam Merkel’s politics, you either agree or disagree with her, depending on your own preferences. But looking at her interpersonal track record is far more revealing. The way a person in power treat his or her inferiors (or rather, subordinates) is what shows you their mentality. In our case, the subordinates are the members of the cabinet.
It is not a safe job, being in the German cabinet, or indeed being in the inner circle around Merkel. One wrong step and you are put on your ear faster than you can blink. Or be too popular