broom Breaking News

First Frost Found

(The World) As early as ordinary October there surely snow the first fine flakes of frosty snow. Soon some will see the perfect passtime in pushing battles using the usual substance which snowmen are constructed with. Cool caps and hip hats will be worn by even cooler and hipper people. Good gingerbread is currently cooked and should be stored till Christmas - if Brian is not around. The great gardens need natural nutrition, too. So much to be made and no silly slave in sight!   Carefully collected crocusses must be buried and the tiny tulips, too. The little leaves must be carefully collected as well. Some salt must be purchased for when it's getting colder, the first frost will freeze the wet water on our footpaths. We could go to California - not cold there, but our outstanding employee will  already have returned. What a waste, spending summer in the States and the winter in you know where! You could at least send a snow shovel...and someone to shovel snow. Can quick-quote-quills get rid of snow? (ALL) 

Fine Fall or Awesome Autumn?

(The World) Apparently, Americans amass naughty new words for completely commonplace concepts. In addition to that they resolutely remain ignorant in various very normal notions.
Among the many Americanisms we lately learned about is the wonderful word for awesome autumn: fall. Now, why should awesome autumn be rudely replaced by fine fall? Mainly because our asinine American friends found it too difficult to write and pronounce. No joking there! Autumn, duly derived from formidable lovely Latin, was deemed damned difficult and 		thus avidly abandoned.
Another thing Americans haven’t got even the teeny-tiniest inkling about are Wellingtons. Yes, you read right: wellies aren’t known in the US. They clandestinely call the comfy boots rubber boots, as if they had no idea of the heroic history wellies can boast of. That is because the average American indeed is ignorant of heroic history unless it clearly concerns America.
We stick to Wellingtons and autumn, though. Maybe this, too, is a cause for Resistance Rocks?
(ALL) 

newbroom-e-gram
September 1 A new term at Hogwarts School for Witchcraft and Wizardry begins. Has anyone ever noticed how politically correct Hogwarts’ full name is? Most probably some very feminist witches protested when it was just a school for magical arts or something like that. We’ll look into that.
September 3 So political correctness is actually something the Americans invented! Funny! They’re going a bit far, though. There are even pleas to call a “manhole cover” differently. A manhole, by the way, is the entry to the canal off the surface of a street. And now feminists are campaigning to have it called “personhole cover”. Oh please!
September 6 We talked to Professor McGonagall about the name Hogwarts got, and she said it was the same it had always had in its 1000 years of existence. So either Rowena Ravenclaw or Helga Hufflepuff was a feminist.
September 10 If that isn’t investigative journalism we don’t know what is. We talked to the Grey Lady, whose real name is Helena Ravenclaw, and who is Rowena’s daughter. She said 		her mother had been adamant about joining “witchcraft” and “wizardry” in the school’s name, because none can exist without the other.
September 11 Only ten years ago the Muggles suffered greatly in the dreadful terrorist attacks on New York. We commemorate and commiserate with them.
September 13 By now we should start writing newbroom, but we’re far too busy trying to get to know the new Quidditch teams up at the school. After all, there might be a chance that broompire will have a sports section. Lee Jordan, CEO of PotterWatch, surely would like that.
September 19 Happy birthday, Patience and Hermione!
September 29 We have our Employee PhD back! At last, she’s back in good old Europe and not harmed by that funny country she stayed in for so long. Just promise us not to leave us again!
September 30 Here’s newbroom, with contributions by all our employees, and a hearty WELCOME BACK!

Tell me sweet little lies

(Los Angeles, USA) Travelling halfway across the world, Brian Cullen met a Muggle fortune teller in the city of angels in the USA. There, fortune telling is a flourishing business and so-called psychics can be found on every corner. Brian picked one and talked to shop owner and chief palmistry expert Marisol Valdez.
BC: Well, Ms Valdez, please explain to our readers what your business is all about.
MV: I am a psychic and particularly gifted in palmistry. I learned the secret art from my grandmother, who was a seer, and when more and more people came to me for help, I opened this outfit.

 BC: Does it pay off?
MV: Oh, it does. Especially since the economic crisis hit so many people really hard, they look for spiritual support and ways out of their dire situation.
BC: So they come to you.
MV: Exactly. And for a very reasonable fee I tell them what their lives will turn out like. You know, like, they are going to get a new job, they are going to get a new loan, things like that.
BC: Let us get that straight: Can you do magic?
MV: You mean like conjuring up a rabbit or flying on a broomstick? Don’t be ridiculous, that’s for the 		movies only!
BC: Of course. But fortune-telling is an honest business?
MV: Um, honest I don’t know. Customers have to like what you say, so sometimes it’s hard to find the right words.
BC: Yes, that must be very hard at times. Thank you, Marisol, for your time.
MV: My pleasure.

Of course, Muggle fortune-telling is per se fraud, since they simply lack the abilities needed to do divination. Yet even if you find a magical person you cannot be sure they aren’t frauds. Just rely on your common sense!
(BC)

newbroom's Next Best Bad Boy Board

broom became one of the prime targets of Death Eater attacks quite soon – but that was just the beginning. Unfortunately, things went on worse than they had begun.
The year Albus Dumbledore died became the year of greatest troubles for Mike Flatley and Brian Cullen. Bravely as they tried to keep their work running and broom circulating, it was not easy at all to do so. Dumbledore’s protection saved them from the worst attacks, but after his death, there was no protection anymore. Life, in short, became truly dangerous.
In addition to that, Mike Flatley’s long-time girlfriend Miranda Donovan lost her job with the Daily Prophet because she objected to how things were run. Even before Death Eaters openly took over the magical newspaper it was quite clear which side the management favoured. Never having been one to love the dark arts, Miranda handed in her notice and moved in with Mike in Hogsmeade. That made lodgings rather crammed. As you, dear readers, might remember, the small house in Hogsmeade was not only headquarters and garden-office but also Brian Cullen’s abode. Now that two more people lived there, it was rather full. Still, having a new reporter on the team was definitely helpful.
The events of that summer cannot be forgotten easily. After Dumbledore’s death, events began to speed up in an eerie way. The Daily Prophet was under Death Eater control, and only shortly after that, the Ministry of Magic fell. With that, it was

only a matter of time until Hogwarts itself would be put under Voldemort’s control – and by that, the Death Eaters would be much closer at hand to raid broom’s offices. It happened, and the new headmaster was none other than Severus Snape. Now we all know that somebody working for broom has a very soft spot for said headmaster. However, right at that time Brian and Mike politely but firmly told this employee to quit working for them. Enough was enough. If the Daily Prophet was taken, then it was doubly necessary to keep broom free from any association with the dark arts. Nobody knew how hard it was on Brian to take that step.
The castle became a new school, very strict, very much dedicated to the dark arts. Some pupils, former members of the DA, became frequent visitors to broom’s headquarters, but even that had to stop very soon since the Death Eaters in charge of discipline, Amycus and Alecto Carrow, put their feet down. Literally. They suddenly apparated inside the garden, burned down the trees and frightened Geronimo into leaking all his ink. Only a day later disaster struck: a large company of Death Eaters came and destroyed the house in Hogsmeade. Mike, Miranda and Brian fled, taking Geronimo, their kneazle Rascal and their duck Rosemary with them. The Hogsmeade era of broom seemed over forever.
What happened next? Well, read the next edition of newbroom and you’ll know!

America and Me

(USA) Back from the land of unlimited possibilities, our employee PhD has graciously agreed to give us a sum-up of her six months there. Maybe Americans should now skip this report and go on to more favourable sections.
I am back! I am finally back in civilized Europe, where people know who they are because they haven’t been uprooted so heftily they forgot where they come from. I am back in the part of the world where people do not think it necessary to know how to hand-craft a car because even the automobile club cannot get to all faraway places. And blessing upon blessings, I am back where you can actually get from A to B by public transportation without it delaying you about an hour.
But let us see what else I missed: Some kinds of food, but that was to be expected. English. You cannot call that language here English – at least what I really missed were hard consonants. When you hear them in the USA, you’d think “better” was spelled “beddah”. Urgh!

 What did I learn: Don’t speak your mind, Americans are not fond of people doing that. Don’t ask too many questions or you seem arrogant. But then, I do seem arrogant simply because I don’t say “beddah” but “better”. See? It’s not exactly a country of unlimited possibilities. It’s a country of invisible boundaries.
Who did I meet: A lot of nice people! Contrary to the prejudices, Californians are not stand-offish and brusk. Oh no, they are warm-hearted, generous and kind. The problem is not with the people – it’s with the surroundings, the weather (yes, eternal sunshine can cause depression), the state, in short – America.
So what is my ultimate lesson from six months in Los Angeles? Never to live there. Not to go back there, unless to visit the people I met and like. Stay well away from America, simply because it is not a country I can breathe in freely. But I am free now. Back home. Back in civilization.
(Employee PhD)

Crossword Puzzle  
1  II  XII        2
   
 III 3   
4  IV      X    
    5 IX
     VIII
6 XI  VII    V      
   
7    I       




  
  

    
      
Across 
1 season
4 "clothes" of a 
      plant
6 month (spelled backwards)
7 in a very 
      broad sense fruit as well

    
      
Down 
1 fruit
2 more fruit
3 time 
      of collecting fruit
5 first flakes might be due 
  soon




The looked for phrase:


____ ____ ____ ____ Y  ____ ____ ____ ____ ____ ____ ____ ____ ____, ____ ____ ____ ____ ____ ____ ____!

I    II   III  III      I    II    IV   IV   V    VI  VII   VII  VIII   IX   VII  X    VII  XI   XII  IX
 


 





Disclaimer: All names, characters and places are property of J.K. 
Rowling and Warner bros., except of those not found in the "Harry Potter" books 
and movies which belong to Ulrike Friedrich and Kirsten Seelbach. No financial 
and/or commercial gain is intended.