broom Breaking News
| (Wizarding World) Violet Vainglory, society expert and greatest gossip known to the editors (sorry, Rita, you’re out of the running!) informs the editors that a wonderful wedding has taken place in the northernmost North.
Acclaimed author Gilderoy Lockhart has married glorious | Glenda Symmons, the magical society’s best-known beauty and rather rich heiress. As Violet says, the coolest couple of the year will live happily ever after, mainly due to the frightening fact of lucky Lockhart’s occasional loss of memory. No doubt this will help to lead a loving life! Congratulations to the love doves! |
| (The world) An absolutely amazing study has recently revealed that churches, chapels and other Christian buildings have been dutifully dedicated to Hogwarts heroic Potions Master! Our way-irritating well-informed gossip Violet Vainglory found out in her never-resting search for really ravishing rumours that | St. Severus is a beloved bishop revered in numerous new and old churches. Spanish Severus’ relics rest in beautiful Barcelona, where legend libels they avidly averted the terrible threat of plague. Rumours reveal that Severus Snape might be named after this Spanish Severus. Others shrewdly state Snape might be a recent recipient of the Philosophers’ Elixir of Life – well, not too recent. Violet waits for his reaction! |
Then am I a happy fly, if I live or if I die
| (Hogsmeade) In a really rare interview, Brian Cullen again shows his inimitable skills as an investigative reporter. Drosophila Melanogaster, famous - or rather infamous - animagus, allows us a view into her life.
BC: Why in the world would anyone choose to be a fly as an animagus? DM: Well, you can always fly around and see things hidden to other people… BC: …yes, get caught in fly-paper, eaten by birds, smashed by fly swats… DM: Oh, no! That’s just the thrill of it, you see? It’s evading those snares that make life interesting as a fly. BC: …and when I think of food – and I think a lot of food – I think of dog excrements, cat excrements, horse excrements… DM: Will you stop that! It’s not like that. I usually feast on sugar, crumbs fallen from cakes, overripe apples and the like. Oh, and raw meat. BC: But aren’t there many | disadvantages being so small?
DM: Begging your pardon? BC: Let me clarify this: what I’m talking about is that the wind and other natural forces have a deep impact on little insects and most other creatures are bigger. DM: Not a midget. But well, have you ever played Quidditch? BC: I’m the interviewer. I pose the questions. DM: Alright, then, I see you haven’t played Quidditch yet. The wind will be a problem for the players, too. And the balls. BC: Let’s not talk about Quidditch and balls. It’s a well-known fact that you are a non- enlisted animagus. Do you use this ability to follow criminal aims? DM: Sometimes. However, I am sure that I am not the only unregistered animagus around. BC: So what do you do? Criminal, I mean. |
DM: I spy. Usually on people in the Ministry, sometimes I’m doing work for
Muggles as well – economic espionage, you know.
BC: Does that pay well? DM: Um, yes. It’s alright to make a living. BC: Great! Is it easy to learn? DM: Espionage? BC: No. Being a fly-animagus. Can you show me? DM: Sure. But you need to watch closely. Miss Melanogaster transformed into a fly in front of my very eyes – unfortunately, I couldn’t make out the trick. At that moment, my colleague Mike Flatley entered the room. The fly, perched on the windowsill, did not think it likely he would get at it. Big mistake! “How does the fly get in here?” Mike asked – and that was the tragic end of Drosophila Melanogaster. Well, it’s one unregistered animagus less. (BC) |
The Moon Over Wogharts
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Be prepared for a new chapter in Patricia's and Sean's adventures!
Patricia, when left alone, began immediately to look for a weapon to use if Sean MacFee should return. There was nothing. Nothing at all – unless she counted her own appearance. Yes, that could be a nice weapon! Patricia carefully lowered the neck of her dress a bit and loosened her hair. Sean came back, sure enough, but he did not pay heed to her new fashion. “Patricia, do you feel hungry?” he asked perfectly unconcerned. “Yes,” Patricia answered and found to her surprise it was true. They had dinner together, then Sean leaned back and looked at Patricia, appreciating the marble arches of her breasts protruding from under the velvet of her bodice. “You are a sight, Patricia,” he marvelled, smiling in a rather boyish fashion that was very cute. “Am I?” Patricia asked coquettishly. “Yes. And you know it. You’re playing with the fire, girl,” Sean said lazily. “No – I do not think so,” Patricia said, giggling slightly. “You are too young and inexperienced yet – we can change the last thing, we shouldn’t change the first,” Sean decided, rising and coming over. He took a strand of Patricia’s hair and curled it around his finger. “So beautiful. So innocent and sweet,” he murmured, then bent to kiss Patricia’s neck. She shivered. Sean’s breath was so nice on her skin, and he was so strong, now softly turning | her head so that he could look into her eyes. “Patricia, you are the greatest gift I could ever get in all my life,” Sean declared and lowered his lips onto Patricia’s. A protest, even if Patricia had been able to protest or thought about it, was impossible. As soon as her lips touched Sean’s everything was lost. Patricia felt a passion rising into her she had never known before. Sean seemed to feel her reaction and responded, turning his head slightly and exploring her mouth with his tongue. At first Patricia thought she would have to choke, but then she learned how to deal with Sean’s tongue caressing hers. Sean softly released her and looked at her face. “My dear lady, are you sure you know what you are doing?” Patricia smiled blissfully. “I do – oh, I do know what I am doing! I love you, Sean MacFee!” He laughed, a deep laughter, sending shivers down Patricia’s spine. Sean began to open the ribbons that held Patricia’s bodice together. He had already freed himself from his shirt. Where his skin was suntanned, hers was as pale as ivory. He pushed back her hair, and she leaned forward, against his warm chest, feeling his muscles work and his heart beat. He let himself fall onto the back and pulled Patricia with him. Laughing they landed on the bed, and Sean began to kiss Patricia’s skin, and she began to explore his body with her fingertips and hands. Sean’s lips | wandered down to Patricia’s breasts, kissing them softly. Patricia gasped surprised. Her hands grabbed Sean’s hair as he kissed her belly. Impatiently Patricia pressed against Sean who smiled and turned, bringing her to lie on her back on the bed. He halted for a moment, taking in all her beauty, her slightly flushed cheeks, her heavy breathing and her eyes that were gleaming like stars. An abundance of dark hair curled across the pillows. “You are a miracle, Patricia, my little captive,” Sean murmured, then sank down onto her body softly. His hands never stopped to caress, to soothe, to arouse Patricia’s passion. Then Sean waited – waited too long for impatient Patricia who began to move, too fast, too hasty, but he calmed her down until they had found a rhythm that led them up the steep path. Patricia’s head was thrown back into her neck, her eyes wide open in ecstasy. Sean had no thought left for her beauty when the stars seemed to fall down onto the earth in a firework of passion. The next morning they reached Plymouth, where Sean let Patricia go. She would have loved to stay – on the ship, in his arms, but she could not. She had to leave. Reluctantly she walked down towards the firm earth. Sean’s eyes were burning on her back and she turned to wave. He waved back, then called: “If you’re unhappy, come to Sean MacFee, my arms are open for you.” |
Aquarius: Beware the dark-haired small persons who cross your way. You might find yourself out of your job faster than you can say ‘Umbrella’. Pisces: Your tendency of falling in love is even more pronounced these days, but mind the red-haired and tousle-headed. They will only break your heart. Aries: This is a good time for bringing things into order. Maybe there are tasks you still have to do – do them now! Nothing like a good cleaning session! Taurus: Nobody likes you? Come off it! You’re the queen/king of your friends and family! Hold your head high and act accordingly – make a royal progress. Gemini: There is nothing to trouble you ahead. Enjoy your time and take things easy – you deserve a relaxing month! Cancer: You really like twitching your fellow creatures, don’t you? Careful, though, you might be twitched in return! | Leo: There’s no business like show business – so keep a smile on your face even if everything is a mess. Times will get better, rest assured. Virgo: You must really mind with whom to argue. As much fun as it might be, you can lose things that are precious to you. Also be aware of dark-haired persons. Libra: Love is in the air for you! If you find your soul-mate, you can be happy, if you have already found him/her, you can be even happier. Scorpio: Stinging and fighting is your concern these days, true to your sign. Well, if you do so, you should be aware of consequences. Sagittarius: Usually you are shooting arrows, but it seems that Cupid’s arrows hit you these days. Enjoy love and life and relax a little to gather energy for the stressful weeks ahead. Capricorn: Do you really have to find every occasion for an accident and use it? Your bed in St Mungo’s is already booked, so don’t increase the risk by doing risky sports. (ALL) |
Hit By A Bludger
| Wanderers’ Seeker Wonderful Last Saturday. Wigtown Wanderers and Pride of Portree battled each other in a deeply moving Quidditch match, write to Fred and George Weasley. Although the match lasted barely the quarter of an hour, it was nevertheless a brilliant display of flying. The Prides’ keeper Meaghan McCormack defied every attempt of the Wanderers to get through her goalposts – a woman should never let anyone enter too easily! And while Meaghan was busy with defending the goal, her fellow team-mates were blocking the Wanderers as best as they could, but they had not a chance to block the way of devilishly fast Seeker Peter Parkin. Of course every Seeker has tried (ever since 1921) to break the record of the fastest capture of a Snitch – but who can ever | beat three and a half seconds? Not even the smart young Seeker, currently studying while not at training for his Auror exam, could be that fast. But with moves as smooth as butter on a hot summer’s day he managed to stay out of reach of the expertly beaten Bludgers and yet never leave the Snitch out of sight. Prides’ Seeker Joseph Bannister was hopeless, sorry to say, but if there’s someone to tell the truth so much the better. So, after just fifteen pitiful minutes of McCormack defending her goalposts like a heroine and Bannister stumbling on in the shadow of brilliant Parkin, Parkin ended the match by a spectacular dive and caught the Snitch. Result: Wigtown Wanderers – Pride of Portree 150 : 20 |